Dad Is Still With Me: Stroke Awareness and a Marathon

I won't lie, training for a marathon has been tougher than I had envisioned. There are a few good lessons and good things, in general, I've gained from the last eight months of training.

Stroke Awareness and Research

As you may know, I'm running to support the American Stroke Association's efforts to increase stroke

Dad and Mom, 2002,
13 years after the stroke

awareness and research. So many of us are affected by stroke each day. Whether we suffer a stroke, or someone we know and love suffers, our lives are changed forever. A real difference can be made with education and funding. 

Several years ago, my own family was impacted by my father's devastating stroke. He suffered the worst, of course, but we all were changed. 

If you would like to donate, you can visit my fundraiser page. 

I have been so encouraged by the support I've had for my running and my efforts at fundraising. We've increased the goal twice in the last few months, and met it each time. I will keep raising funds through January, and likely after.

Running Through Life

It takes commitment to train for a marathon. After making the commitment, as with most things in life, it will be tested. Mine certainly has. 

At the very outset, in early May, I believe, my knees were hurting badly. I started to take it as a sign that I was nuts for thinking I could run a marathon, but I came to my senses and visited my doctor and a physical therapist. Fortunately, I had a great therapist, Jennifer Tuska, at Kort Physical Therapy and I was better than ever in a few weeks. I had survived the first test.

Me and the monkeys at
the zoo.

As my runs became longer, the time requirement increased. I was determined not to let my family time suffer and it soon became apparent that this marathon thing would require their support. My wife, the kids, everyone has been great and on board. My daughters even run with me, sometimes. I hope this whole get-in-shape thing will help me be around for them all for a long, long time.

As with any other sport, your mind has to be focused to maximize your output and progress. When the stress of work, or the house, or the broken car, or any number of things pop up, its extremely tough to hit the road for a two hour run, or even a short one. I've learned to simply put one foot in front of the other and do it anyway. 

Dad Is Still There

Still, if I wasn't committed ridding the world of stroke, I wouldn't have the same drive to succeed. I think of my dad when I was a little boy; the strong, peaceful, outdoor-loving, dad. I think of the hard times he, and we, had after the stroke. I think of the man he became, overcoming his stroke to some extent, even better in many ways, but never returning to his former self.

Even though he's gone, he is still with me. I hear his words and see a lot of him in myself. I keep going because of him, for my own children, and for myself. 

It looks as if I will finish my marathon in January. I hope to post a good time for a first-timer, but it doesn't really matter. Finishing is what counts, this time.

Become a part of this whole thing here. And, follow this blog to keep up with all things fatherly and running-ly.

Stroke Awareness

I was planning to introduce a week-long series of posts that sought to define this blog, and me, this week, but something more important presented itself. That "something" is also a big part of "me," so I am actually following through with my planned defining.

Today is World Stroke Day. Take this day, this week, to learn to recognize the symptoms of stroke and what to do when stroke happens.

Over the next couple of decades, stroke deaths are projected to increase by 30%, unless we do something to educate ourselves on how to prevent it and how to react when it happens. Each of us, over our lifetime, will be touched by stroke in some fashion. My own father suffered a devastating, life-altering stroke. I can tell you, it not only changed his life, but also our entire family.

Learn, spread the word, and lets start turning the tide!

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Is This Happening?

My dad, a few years before his stroke.

May 1989

When I visited my parents' house around 5:00 p.m., I usually found my dad sitting at the table, watching the news and smoking a cigarette after having worked in the garden, tended to the cattle, or any number of other things that could happen under direct sunlight.

This day appeared to be no different. I walked in the front door and said, "Hey." He was at the table, watching television and trying to hold and light his cigarette. He dropped it a couple of times before giving up on the task for a moment. 

As I went to get a drink and some food out of the frig, he began telling me about working in the garden and how it was coming along, and how unusually hot it had been for a day in May. 

In between my munching and gulping, I noticed that his speech didn't sound quite right, a little slurred. I was about 21, so his 51 years seemed ancient to me. I instantly thought he had gotten too hot and was tired, or he had drank one too many beers due to the heat. But, I watched him continue to unsuccessfully light his cigarette. He'd drop it, pick it up, and drop it again. 

I asked him if he was ok. He said he was. I looked at his face. Something looked a little different, but if the slurred speech and cigarette trouble weren't happening, I wouldn't have noticed. 

After another minute or two, he went to lie down and was unsteady on his feet.

I thought, "Is this happening?" It seemed like a stroke, but it took me another couple of minutes to act on my feeling. I called my mother and brother. We went to the hospital. He seemed to feel better. The doctor sent him home.

Later that night, he had another, more significant episode. We went back to the hospital.

At the hospital, after the second episode, we learned that he had suffered a significant stroke and that the initial episode had been a smaller one. He survived, but in the days and weeks to come, we learned the extent of the stroke. His right side had been severely affected. He had no use of his right arm, no use of his right leg and the right side of his face had no movement.

He eventually regained some use of his leg and was able to walk short distances with a cane. His face returned to normal, but he never regained any use of his arm. His mind was not affected and his speech returned to normal, thankfully.

It seems strange to say, but he became more emotional after the stroke. He was much more prone to happiness and sadness, tears of joy or tears of pain. 

The stroke happened in 1989. Dad passed away in 2011. He lived and enjoyed his life for over 20 years after the stroke, but he would never mend another fence, never help another old mother cow deliver her calf, never toss his granddaughters into the air or run and play with them, though he wanted to, so badly.

All of this could possibly have been avoided. 

Please. Learn to see the signs. Learn to act and not think, "Is this happening?"

 

Visit the American Stroke Association and learn, and consider helping to further research here.